This lovely son of mine finished his final day as a senior in high school today. We needed to see how he did on his Lit final to make sure he was graduating. He has this thing, he doesn’t do well for the first half of the semester and then somehow saves it at the last second. It isn’t my favorite way to deal with school. This last month has been incredibly stressful for everyone.
Even though it was a close call, I chose to believe that he would pull it off like he usually does. I ordered graduation announcements and mailed them out. I posted on social media how proud I was. This morning as I was procrastinating a run I realized that it was his last final and I hadn’t done anything to show him that it was cause for celebration. I raced to the store to buy balloons to tie to his car but the line was awful. And me being me I didn’t have my genius idea until he was due to get out of school any minute. So instead I raced to the grocery store while calling my super creative sister who told me to decorate his car with whip cream and Oreos!!
When I got to the church parking lot where he has to park due to the horribly small school parking his car was already gone. I was so bummed I missed my chance to surprise him. But why waste the effort? So I found his car at his dads and I proceeded to decorate his car in the driveway. I went inside to congratulate him and thats when he told me his last final hadn’t even started yet. I grabbed his hand and brought him outside. His face when he saw his car was everything I hoped for. He lit up from the inside and circled the car and laughed like my little boy. He didn’t even mind that the whipped cream was already melting in the Georgia humidity.
He drove to school to take his final with the cookies still on. Tonight when he stopped by, the Oreos are still there despite the rain we’ve had today. It was very validating.
As a mom of 3 boys and a sister to 3 brothers I have always felt a kinship when I see other moms of 3 boys. I feel it with all moms, no matter how many kids of course. But this felt like we knew something about each others lives. I always wanted us to high 5 or do a knowing super hero nod to each other.
For this purpose I started a Facebook page a few years ago Mom of boys, there are others that are really closely named lol. I’ve only had maybe 150-200 followers and I mostly post little memes that I find, little pictures.
A few months ago a fellow mom blogger asked me to write a blog post for them and they tied to to my Facebook account, and all of a sudden in the last 5 days I went from 500 followers to 5000! It was such a fun week to watch the numbers climb higher then I ever dreamed! I believe it is slowing down but I was so amazed! I’ve been responding to all comments and posting a little more often and even creating a few memes of my own to help be interesting. I don’t know if it will last , but it feels like a cosmic pat on the back.
This is the link to my page. If you go there let me know what you think!
I am really enjoying spring in Georgia. This little pasture I found on a walk today was so green and beautiful. I was sad to see several “no trespassing” signs and this little bit of barb wire blocking me from exploring such a wonderland. I enjoyed the view and the gorgeous smell of honeysuckle that softens the barb wire.
I remember the night in the hospital when I held my first child, a son. I wrote graduation speeches, practiced wedding toasts. I was a little delirious from the drugs I admit. But I don’t think I’m the only one that begins to plan their future from the first moment
Not many of my plans worked out very well. Turns out kids come with their own personality and this spawns ideas and plans of their own. Some days I love the ride and the journey of it, they are so much more then I could have ever imagined. Some days I feel like my heart is breaking from the pain and loss, to see them go down hard paths that won’t end well. When they blame you for everything, point out all your faults in detail. Those days suck.
I find it’s important to let go. Let go of the fantasy, let go of the planning, it’s practice for letting them go. I can’t believe my son graduates from high school in 2 short weeks! I can’t wait to be done with his life in high school! School with him has been difficult. He is very smart but not at all interested in sitting in a class room.
A few weeks ago our church put together a night to celebrate all the graduates. They asked the parents to submit photos of their child growing up and prepare a small speech about their child. I didn’t know about it until 10 minutes after it ended. My ex didn’t tell me about it and he was receiving all the emails and requests. He called right after it ended to casually mention where they had been. I have been the photographer of their lives, the keeper of the scrapbooks and photo albums. I have been waiting to show anyone my kids growing up. My ex sent in a few pictures he had on his phone and Facebook. My son had half the time the other kids had. I have had a really hard time letting this one go. I called my son and cried that I hadn’t been there and that I hadn’t known. He laughed and told me he hadn’t even wanted to go and didn’t know I wasn’t invited. But this is my child who has always been sensitive to things and people around him, I know somewhere inside it was another strike on him from the divorce.
Next week he gets his yearbook. I made his senior post and chose the pictures and the really awesome Tony Hawk quote (my son is a major skateboarder lol). I have that.